Reverb

A close friend of mine texted me the other day to let me know that she, while working out, had lost her groove when an ABBA song came on. She of course professes to hate ABBA but I don't believe her...I think she is a closet ABBA super fan actually. According to her, immediately after losing said groove she thought of me. Not because I am a dancing queen or anything silly like that, but because I, through a few years of constant effort have inserted myself into her brain, with an almost Pavlovian response, ABBA equals Cheffie (that's me).

I would regularly send her YouTube clips of ABBA. I would call her up and whether she answered or her messaging kicked in, I would hold my phone to the radio when an ABBA song came on, giggling in the background because I'm funny that way. I think she protests not because she finds the Swedish super group offensive but because she is probably forced to hold back from dancing and singing at the time. I get that, my advice to you my friend...belt it out, it's good for the soul.

I smiled a lot when I got that message from her and it got me to thinking of reverberations. Which led me to remember reading Mitch Abloom's The Five People You Meet in Heaven. According to the writer it's not necessarily who you think or even hope for when you make that journey and come face to face with your eternal companions. In this case a few of the people were unknown to the protagonist as I recall...and there in lies the moral, we never really know how we are affected by the daily run ins in our lives. Nor how we may be affecting others that cross our paths.

Certainly it is easy to see and, to a certain extent, even measure how I affect my kids and they I. Or my friend with the ABBA phobia. She will forever equate them with me. Does she know that I think of her when I am, on those very rare occasions, feeling negative about whatever? Maybe she even remembers kicking my ass in her office years ago when I was being a dickhead negative Nellie...laying into me in the way only a true friend would. She knows now I suppose. We have that kind of relationship, from ass kicking to ABBA, our continuing effect on each other will resonate on for years to come.

But what of the ones we don't know about. Something we may not even know we did or said may very well be part of someones very existence to this day. How do we know? Conversely how do we know if anything has affected us. Obviously many things have, how could they not? But we don't really know all of it do we?

I like to think that the important thing here is that we do try and be more aware of the here and now when something does happen. Today marks four years since the passing of Scott's son Simon, and while I can never even fathom the pain the memory and loss must cause I can take a tiny bit of comfort in the knowledge that I learned a lot from this time as a friend to the family. I saw grace and humour carry broken hearts through the days and months that followed. I saw how strong people can be when they have to be because they have no choice. I saw love.

Take a moment to think about things that are truly significant. Don't let the imperative drown out the important. And listen to those echoes, those resonant vibrations through our lives...they matter. Trust me...the world will be a better place for us all.

Ciao
D

Photo courtesy of my friend Margo