I admire people that are creative, those that can express through the arts, through written word and music, a passion for something have always been something that I wish I could emulate. Alas, I am no artist. I couldn't paint worth a crap, the last time I was asked to "sculpt" I made a rock out of lard, wasn't even a good looking rock, and while I played in a band while in high school I am no musician. I was taught my part by others and I replicated the music for performance.
I think the only place I feel any whisper of artistic leanings is in writing. And laid bare for all to see is the fruit of that writing. So, you can see I'm not really artistic at all. That's ok, I'm not going to drive in Monaco for Ferrari either. Whatever. I have somewhere the first few pages of the great Canadian novel which I think is not bad, but don't hold your breath for the movie rights anytime soon.
I wonder if I'm missing the inspiration thing, that intangible drive that forces you to express yourself somehow, the heart of a poet thing that speaks to you and doesn't leave you alone until you find a way to bring forth that which is most moving to you. The sentiment that "I want to say something" is kind of strong in me and I think maybe this blog is how it's finally manifesting itself. Don't know....
Some of you may say that cooking is artistic, and you'd be right, but I have never viewed it as such. I can do pretty plates but I'm more interested in the taste, the texture and the feel of food as opposed to how snap chat worthy it is. And I am not a pastry chef...too exact for my liking. I want freedom to fuck around with a dish, and baking is a science, so not my forte. But you would love my white chocolate crème brûlée...just saying.
Funny thing about my cooking career, it was not even really on my radar growing up. I get asked that all the time, what made you go into cooking? Was it your mothers food that inspired you? Uhm, no. I didn't have an appreciation for anything like that until after going into the business. I, my friends, backed into this career...literally. I did work at a restaurant in high school but that was just a job for me, a means to pay for beer and gas, and while in Europe, cuckoo clocks. When I was younger I wanted to be an architect and somehow along the line I wanted to go into film. I wanted to be the next Spielberg. That having something to say desire was in it's early stages back then....and I felt I wanted to say it through film.
The problem, as I saw it back then, was that the fine arts program at York University was pretty exclusive. 40 people accepted out of 400 applicants....so you needed to be good already at something and you probably needed better grades than I had. Remember my post on high school....enough said. This rejection left me with a decision to make and I chose to take a year off, take night school to bring my marks up and re-apply for the following year....well, since I haven't won an oscar you know what happened. Rejected again.
I was pretty dejected at this point, I had no idea what I wanted to do. I had my application in to go to college for the technical side of the business, figuring it was a way in (as an aside, the what ifs get asked here, what if I had gone into that field?). But what happened was something different entirely. I was at work and I was feeling pretty down actually. I must have been bitching about things and one of the other cooks I was working with asked me what else I might have liked to do. Well genius, if I knew that I would be doing it...but I answered with an almost funny half serious answer. I think owning a bar would be cool, thinking of the free booze and playing Sam Malone to someone else's Norm. And fate steps in and he says...you should take some culinary in college so you can always know what's going on in your kitchen, it will help you control costs and so on. That actually sounded like a good plan to me....changed my application to culinary management and as they say, the rest is history.
I took to the course like a fish to water. It was unreal to me that I could do such things with food. I was learning by leaps and bounds and I quickly became one of the leaders in the class because I seemed to know what I was doing. I didn't think so but act as if ye have faith and faith shall be given...right? I learned a lot that first year and the second year was where I really found my place in the kitchen. To put it as humbly as I can...I rocked. Haha I did very well and finished with honours at the top of the class. I was home.
Which is funny when I recall walking through the halls of York for an interview with the selection committee. I'm old school rock and roll rebel guy walking amongst the all black turtle neck wearing Doc Martin crowd...I did not fit in. Maybe I would have been better off suited to running the equipment in some way, but my calling was found at the suggestion of a half way house reject...he was crystal meth chic before crystal meth was a thing, but if not for him, who knows where I would be today?
Maybe the writing thing will pick up one day. Or maybe I will do stand up comedy, stand there and let people laugh at me.
Ciao
D
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