Dinner with Stephen Fearing

A few years back I was dating a wonderful woman that was instrumental in my growth as a newly single 45 year old man. She was eclectic and interesting along with being a whole lot of fun to be with. She also managed to say one of the nicest things that anyone ever said about me, I felt encapsulating my persona; when responding to a pet nick name I had for her she said that I was a combination of a farmers market in the south of France, an Italian man sitting in a sidewalk cafe watching the women go buy and a whistling Irish man setting off on a long walk. I liked that a lot...her perception of me brought a smile to my face.

She also knew a shit load of interesting people, famous and infamous in and around the city. Where she grew up and the business she had once owned made for ample opportunity to get introduced to them...and by extension I had met a few of these people in our short lived romantic time together.

We were planning on attending a show at a local brew pub one night, Tom Wilson was playing a solo acoustic set during HUFF. Tom is a hulking beast of a man that used to lead Junkhouse, with their classic bit of Canadiana in the song Shine. More recently and currently he is part of Blackie and the Rodeo Kings along with Colin Linden and Stephen Fearing, a sort of country roots, but not really country, homage to Willie P Bennett. Prior to the night of the show she had suggested we go to dinner with Stephen Fearing and his wife, whose name I forget. Not being one to shy away from things I was all in. Plans were made and off we went for what turned into a very interesting evening.

We dined on Lebanese food, drank wine and got to know each other a little bit. I was definitely the odd one out as I didn't know any of these people outside of my girl and I had no history with them to make a connection with. It didn't matter though, I was made to feel very welcome and, most interestingly to me at the time, an equal - no better or worse than anyone there. My married life did a good job of casting people into categories and grading those categories, something I was always uncomfortable with especially related to the church. We all came from differing back grounds with different careers and experiences, but what mattered that night was what we were doing in the moment. No pretense, no bullshit.

Stephen was genuinely interested in my life as a chef as I was in his life as a musician. We asked questions and told stories and I like to think that his warmth and interest in every one was authentic. I felt at ease. I also felt that this was how he gleaned ideas for songs...life expereinces forming the basis for his music. I do that now with the writing of this blog, as you have probably figured out by now.

After dinner was done and our goodbyes were said we parted ways and headed to the pub for the show and some more wine. This is where the night takes on a bit of a surreal tack. It seems that there is a slightly famous comedienne that has a thing for Tom...and I guess they had a thing for a while and she reportedly wanted some more of that thing, but Tom was not obliging with his thing. Which is the pre-amble on how we found ourselves sitting behind this lady, in her very short and tight skirt doing her Basic Instinct routine for Tom who was playing in front of her. The show was great, he is a performer of note, but it was distracting to have this lady do what she was doing a few feet away from us. I wondered how distracted Tom might have been but I think he was high as a kite at that time so he probably never even noticed...that and the lights were probably in his face the whole time.

Suffice to say I have no idea how the night ended for the two former love birds but it really did cap the night off in hilarious fashion. That and the rendition of Shine he did using only his voice and his body as a percussion instrument...wow...just wow.

It was a good night all around, one of those nights where you can imagine yourself sharing a cab with Neil Young or having a late night drink with Peter Mansbridge in the lobby bar at the Chateau Frontenac, all by chance and circumstance to be sure. A treasured memory born of serendipity.

As things happen to go, she and I parted ways as a couple but we have remained friends. Every once in awhile getting together for a coffee or a glass of wine. Wishing eachother the best when things change for the better and being truly happy for eachother when it does.

Life is beautiful

Ciao
D