Still I am blurry

Perhaps an update on the reason this whole blog thing started in the first place.

I saw my Russian super villain ophthalmologist yesterday. After being shuttled around a few different examination rooms and having a very young Doogie Howser like doctor in training deal with me....seriously man, wheres the real doctor? I was told my tumour is not growing, which is good and according to his measurements it is the same size as when he measured it. More than slightly puzzled since when I was last in the big smoke my tumour had shrunk significantly..I think I'll take their measurements over his. He chalked it up to different machines and different people doing the measurements...sure doc.

Nothing else to worry about as of now so I fall into monitoring mode. The only issue is the blurry vision out of my affected eye. Think trying to see through a dirty window with globs of blood being swung across your field of vision on a regular basis and you have my view. I suspect it won't come back so my new reality is this impairment. The alternative is being dead so I guess I'm OK with that. I'm still a little pissed that spidey powers have not been realized as of yet...sigh

So, a moment to reflect I suppose. Boy, a lot has happened in the past eight months since that diagnosis. The fear and uncertainty that accompanied this not so great news, not just for myself but for family and friends, has been a bit of a kick to the gut. The support I have received and continue to receive has been nothing short of amazing. I think my response was made easier knowing I had plenty of people beside me. This blog has become the most visible manifestation of my response to this whole fuck up...FUCK CANCER!!! Part therapy and part soap box I have come to enjoy this exercise in spilling my brain to you....hello China and the Philippines by the way.

And to show that I'm not a one trick pony, here's what else has happened since December 28, 2015.

A shit load of meals have been prepared for my job...I don't think I want to know how many people I have cooked for over the years, it might be depressing...hahaha I've been back and forth to Toronto a few times and one of them was for actual vacation with my two youngest. I went to New York and had the best time ever...it's New York ya'll!!! Awesome time.

Saw some movies, some live music, ate a lot of sushi, drank a lot of bad coffee all in the pursuit of love, or as we call dating in the digital age. It never fails to amaze me, this whole process of dating. I've met some amazing women and then there were others...that's the way it's done now so I suppose I'm par for the course.

The kidney stones and accompanying gravel after the treatment I went through....holy hell, two weeks of pain that I am glad are behind me. Save for the blurry vision I actually feel pretty darn good. The aches I was feeling for much of the year since I had a small tear in my meniscus and the damage done when I fell at work last year are pretty much gone. I credit my recuperating powers and turmeric...just saying. OK, the physio helped I'm sure.

The kids have progressed on to their next levels, and in the case of my son, university time for him. So weird to think that two of my kids are at Dal now. Such a wonderful time for them...at least I hope so. They are really growing up to be great people...their own people. I like that they are not cookie cutter kids.

I've participated in the most ludicrous exercise that I have been involved with...the annulment process through the church is, as the kids these days put it, ridonkulous. Once a decision comes down I think I will write about it...it's quite the thing really.

I didn't win the lottery to be able to live in Europe for long stretches of time. Nor to go to university just for the hell of it. I didn't get a motorcycle or bungee jump off of a bridge. I never did that high speed chase I've been aching to do and contrary to what you may think I haven't actually punched anyone in the throat.

Hmmmmmm...those seem to be the "big" things I think. I won't bother you with the cliche of growing as a person and discovering more of myself...I have and I continue to do so, but if you've read any of this blog you already know that. I am more aware, happier and sillier than ever...blurry vision or not.

Thanks for reading

Ciao
D